I’ve been considering my career options lately and I’ve discovered that maybe I’m not just limited to aspiring writer. With my background in wordsmithing I could work in marketing. Or better yet, I could work in advertising. I could work in advertising and make a total killing. And all I’d have to do is make smug, preening adverts. And I would be super-rich.
Last year, I wrote a post about having PMT and wanting to land a fist directly into the television following an Always advert. This year, it’s the latest iphone 4 ad that’s got me clenching my fists.
Feel bad that you don’t have an iPhone? Feel left out because you can’t access the app store? So you should.
People who have an iPhone are, apparently, in some kind of elite; only they can pay for their coffee with their phone. Can you pay for your coffee with your phone? Can you? No. Neither can I. But then I’m a traditionalist, and prefer to use that other thing, y’know – money. Or sometimes if I’m feeling really crazy (or forgotten to go to an ATM), I use a debit card.
You’d think that as a geek with technojoy I’d be all: HELLZ YEAH! The iPhone rocks! etc. But no. When this advert comes on, all I think is this:
It’s not just the smugness of the ad that grates with me. I mean, all ads are smug. They have to be smug, because the whole purpose of an ad is to say “Our product is awesome and you should buy it now!” but what annoys me is that I know lots of people with iPhones, and that it seems to have one colossal flaw: it sort of, sometimes, most of the time, doesn’t connect calls. You know. Like a PHONE would.
Sure, it’ll pay for your coffee, it’ll sync you calendar and contacts and your iTunes playlist, it’ll tell you where the nearest toilet is, it’ll probably tell you how many times you should wipe your arse before flushing – in fact it probably has an app for wiping your arse. But when it comes to it’s primary function (i.e. being a phone) it will divert the call to voicemail. I don’t know why. Maybe because there are so many folks with iPhones who are milling about using up all the network resources to pay for their Starbucks coffee.
To conclude, the iPhone can’t phone. But it does everything else and is, therefore, a successful piece of technology. In fairness, I am bias to anything that will pay for my coffee – so I can kind of see the logic.
But I still don’t want an iPhone. Until they stop accepting cards and cash for coffee.